I was going past a church marquee the other day and saw yet another "clever" slogan that is sure to pull impressed people into the service this next sunday. Lately I have begun to notice these signs more and more. Im struck by the banners on the side of churches shouting out mission and vision statements full of words like "hope, caring, love, ordinary/extraordinary, community" etc. Churches truly are copying the corporate world of branding by putting these on their marquees and buying giant banners printed in bold letters. Spending time in meetings with business managers to determine which 5-10 word statement best describes all those outreach activities they are going to do once they have decided on the mission statement and ordered t-shirts.

Its not bad to want people to know you are those things, its good. What gives me pause is that many evangelical churches spend so much time proclaiming they aren't like the "world" and crafting their alternatives to this perceived evil force. Key issues are denounced like abortion, homosexuality, divorce,and pre-marital sex. But in so many ways the church embraces, and is a product of, the very culture it derrides. Damaging things like gossip, boastfulness, pride, gluttony, selfishness, etc. are not called out. That might make people feel guilty, but since the majority havent had an abortion or are gay, those things are safe to attack.

The rampant individualism and lifestyle gluttony is very present in most evangelical families/individuals. They hear about feeding and clothing the poor and think " if only we could afford to help!" and then go blow $50 on lunch after church. For years this has frustrated me. This is one of the reasons I stopped attending services at a church building is because every week was too stressful. When I sought out an older believer for advice and guidance -wisdom! I found few or none. If I found someone who fit the bill, they were already swamped with other people who had found them first and were on the brink of burnout. When I would try to live like Jesus and make changes I found it was a very lonely thing to do. But when I wanted to go bowling or have a Super Bowl party, there were plenty of people lined up.

Im tired, I realized not to long ago. Im tired of searching and searching. As I told Josh this weekend, I miss Jesus. I miss being gathered somewhere I know he is present. I want to know real salvation, feel truly saved from my desperate sin filled state - not just empty promises of "hope, love, care, and above all, Purpose!"

maybe more to come....